i read something i shouldn't have, and i couldn't get the words out of my head.
sometimes i'm afraid to love him, because so many others have loved him before.
i have this gut feeling, that maybe were falling apart.
i tried to hold on to his seems, and and tape up all the of this mess.
but when i finally look down, i see no progress.

so after i read that certain thing,which i shouldn't have. i curled up in myself and when he looked at me i put on my best smile.

sometimes, i want to scream. just let my lungs have there way. i want to scream sooo loud that maybe..maybe we'll finally be put back together. but more times then not, all i want is us to be happy.

were happy right?

yes. yes.
were happy. because i recongnize this feeling that everything is going to be okay.

today, i had to wake up at seven thirty, because i have class at eight forty five. i'm soooo sleepy. i'm sick also, so i should probably be drinking more tea than i have been.

hey its been a while since i visited this site.
i just added a new picture of myself.

i guess it says alot about how i feel.
pretty naked, and vulnerable.

i guess thats all there is to say.
i'm just feeling naked.

my brother is visiting.
so happy he's home.
it's hard living alone...

i'm drinking tea...and feeling fantastic.
but i have a cold which hopefully won't ruin the feeling.

" today i woke up and said, today's the day to live or be dead"

going to have to say that today isn't the best day.
feeling pretty sick and havne't felt that ..those...butterflys yet that i normally get from talking with mac.

maybe later tonight?
but i'm leaving for portland on friday.
so i'm going to listen to fleetwood mac, with my dad, so it isn't so awkward.

i'm going to see dale, one of the people who've helped me though life and i couldn't thank him enough.